A Literary View

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I’d like to say I am the most normal here. But it sometimes takes me so long to type, I forget what I am typing about. I take a drink of water and try to forget but it never comes to me. Not really. I wish I had it all together. I’m f’ing tripping my balls off since before Thanksgiving! But it’s not like I’m taking drugs, I mean I’m figuring shit out I never imagined before!!! WTF am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to sound, sound when I have been invalidated? What defense do I have when I am not to be believed?

What else would a well behaved man do on the 4th of the year? I don’t know? What if a lot of people you trusted turned out to be lying to you and it had a large affect over your life?

I can’t believe it’s after midnight and I have to prove myself.

I don’t know who knows where I am from but have you ever been judged, solely on you’re accent? I have a deep NH no matter how I try to disguise it.

I don’t know what to do? I feel like I’m failing all the time. I’m freaking most of the time people think I am being normal! I got to such extremes! The littleness shit can make me freak out for days And these people ask me questions on the phone and determine my fate from my answers? WTF? Again? You know they are calling many people per day. But, But, But, they don’t have to treat you like a piece of shit when you do talk live?

You don’t know what these meds do to you! I took my night to get up early to see my daughter. For some strange reason I woke up a few hours later and it was dark and I thought I didn’t take my dark meds and took them again but it was too late; I was completely awake!

You don’t know when it will happen. You don’t know who will say what? But sometimes a small phrase will be the ultimate!!! No, I’m not eating anything special. Anyone can do it when they piece the puzzle together. I am demonstrably ignorant of what they pulled on me but I can’t see it any other way now!

I still don’t know what day it is. Now I know because I looked! It’s wicked early Mundee if you haven’t guessed my accent. I bought radishes but they are pretty spicy.

Of course I’m not imagining the pearly gates. lol I could barely spell it! It’s just what am I in line for? 43 best schizophrenic in the world? Wouldn’t that be weird if I did push that shit on you? The DSM? Do you feel like being diagnosed? There is definitely a medication for it! They tell you, you are better for it!

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