I Have Arrived

Robot Brain

Tuesday May 25, 2021: The sun burnt my face and neck and parts of my arms and legs. I am pale so I burn easily. It was my fault. I went for a 3 hour bike ride on the warmest day of the year and didn’t wear any sunscreen. Last weekend was the first time I took my bicycle any distance. I did 15 miles on Saturday and 30 miles on Sunday. By the time realized my face was getting scorched I was still trying to push myself to my destination. I am glad I made the eventual decision to turn around. I almost didn’t make it home, my body was so sore. Especially the knee above where I broke my leg. As soon as I got home my body was back to normal and the only soreness was my toasted skin.

I was lucky I had some vinegar to spray on myself. It sounds gross but it really helps a sunburn. I found a bottle of aloe lotion and I’ve been putting that on since.

Wednesday, May 26, 2021: I dropped down to my goal weight before my goal timeline before my birthday last month. I lost 20 pounds so quickly I have loose skin all over my belly. I use 5 pound ankle weights. They are pretty bulky. I was just thinking, I lost 4 of those things. That’s a lot of fat! I can’t believe 180 was an acceptable goal weight for me. I should be trying to lose 20 more pounds. 180 is my Latuda limit. It doesn’t matter how much I exercise and diet I can’t get below that. On Zyprexa my limit was 200 pounds. I can’t believe I was happy to get down to that weight at the time. That is 40 pounds overweight. Obese.

Thursday, May 27, 2021: I’ve been having out of body experiences while exercising. I can’t go too far. Just enough to see my entire body. My mind is still connected to my brain because I can tell it to correct my form if I am not moving the right way. I have tried to do it in bed lying down and listening to the same music but it doesn’t happen. I can’t do it while I am sitting here typing. Maybe it has to do with my brain being occupied with controlling my movements. The only other time I exercise is riding my bike and I don’t dare to close my eyes while doing that. As soon as I open my eyes my mind is back in my brain.

Friday, May 28, 2021: Man, they put a lot of noise in my head when I try to figure all this shit out.

I tried quitting Latuda but that turned out to be a bad idea. I made it 3 weeks and had to start taking it again. It is still building up in my system. After kicking the Sapphris I wanted to figure out what is real or not.

I got both of my shots. It was easy. I went to Walmart both times. With all the conspiracies you think I would be scared of the vaccine instead of the medications my doctor is giving me. I had to go to the state’s website and give my info and make an appointment. By the time I got my second shot a few weeks later Walmart was taking walk ins off the street. I could have waited and gone anytime.

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